And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up. So then, as we have opportunity, let us do good to everyone, and especially to those who are of the household of faith.

Galatians 6:9-10 (NKJV)

There is a mistaken idea that the more you do and accomplish, the more God loves you. As a result, we can believe in the gospel of God's grace while yet pursuing a work-based, performance-driven relationship with Him. This is exemplified by our need to measure our acceptance and importance by how busy we appear to be and how many things we are involved in.

Many of us have a need to rediscover the gospel again. When we discover and understand God's perspective on grace, we will be free of the pathological need to perform for God's or others' approval. If we don't break this bad behaviour, we'll end up with a church culture that overemphasises our actions over God's actions.

It is a tragedy when being part of a church community becomes just another item on the "to do" list.

When our service and relationships are ego-driven rather than Spirit-led, we are hindered from fulfilling our true calling and purpose. If a believer or a church truly embraces the gospel, it will be evident in how they see and treat others. As far as the gospel goes, we are called to be cooperative rather than competitive, compassionate rather than contentious and forgiving rather than condemning.

Of course, we'd be naïve to believe that we won't be put to the test (again and again) by individuals and situations both inside and outside our church community who aim to undermine the gospel and tear the fabric of love and grace. This is why, rather than focusing on activities and events, the church should place a greater emphasis on authentic relationships.

We are not the kind of church God wants us to be if we spend our time doing easy things like organising programmes instead of hard things like repairing and rekindling broken friendships. In the words of the Apostle Paul, we are to do good to everyone, especially those in the home of faith

Without repentance, our default response when relationships become strained is to leave for another church.

While we may make the excuse that the other church has a better programme or ministry for us and the kids, the truth is that we are avoiding our problems and denying God the opportunity to work forgiveness and reconciliation between us and others. If this is the case, we are not being kind and gracious towards the community God has given us. We will have to learn crucial relationship lessons again sooner or later if we do not take advantage of this God-given opportunity to learn them together. It won't be any easier or less costly.

By moving away from a performance-based relationship with our Heavenly Father and into a grace-focused relationship free of guilt, shame, and judgement, we are extending this freedom to others as well. It will also have a huge difference in the way we do church.