5 Love does not seek its own. 1 Corinthians 13:5Do you deny your family or friends your love and affection unless they give in to your demands or meet your expectations? If the answer is yes, that would be selfish or self seeking. I once read a story of a billionaire who used his wealth to control his loved ones. He deviously threatened to disinherit them unless they acceded to his whims and fancies, no matter how unreasonable they were. Some cowered to his demands but others chose to walk away, not willing to suffer the indignity of losing their self-respect.